Thursday, September 30, 2010

April Fools Day in September

I've been tricked.  More than once.  I think it's a big conspiracy.

Yesterday morning I was very tired, but I had two sweet pastries that were giving me motivation to move.  I was going to eat them just before I left to go to school.  I would drink my coffee, watch the news, and get the satisfaction of a pastry in the morning.

Then it happened.  The filling wasn't creamy or sugary.  It wasn't fruit or a milk product.  I wasn't even lucky enough for it to be flavorless.  My pastry was filled with some horrible tasting, liver like substance.  There aren't words to describe how I felt.

Fortunately, I had some bread and jam.  The jam was new, so I hadn't eaten any yet.  There were pictures of berries on the jar, not organs of some unknown animal, so I new I was safe.  In a hurry, I quickly scooped out a big glob with a knife, and it managed to sail through the air of my kitchen.  It wasn't my happiest morning.

Today was a little different.  I woke up and grabbed a nice, safe yogurt out of the fridge.  I was too tired to open my eyes and pick one out, so I let fate choose.  Fate hates me.  It tasted like dirt.  I looked at the package and saw pictures of walnuts, and I then remembered buying it to figure out exactly what flavor it is (walnut yogurt can't exist).  After a few bites, I got used to the flavor, but it was still weird.  If someone tells you that yogurt can't taste exactly like walnuts, you can tell them they are wrong.

I have a mysterious pastry for tomorrow morning, we'll have to see how that goes.  Third time's a charm, right?  The Hungarians seem to be teaching me their luck, along with the rest of their culture.

This afternoon, I did some traveling.  I went to China and saw some sweatshops.  It was pretty exciting.  There are doorways here in Békéscsaba that magically transport you to another continent.  They advertise cheap, Chinese made clothing and goods on the outside.  Inside, they smell really bad, are full of Asian people, have the most painful fluorescent lighting known to man, and are crammed full of all kinds of clothes, shoes and suitcases.  Everything's cheap, but the quality seems low. 

I think they're my favorite places ever.  I can buy knock-off designer clothes a block away from where I live.  It's a little bit eerie how much they look like a sweatshop (at least how one looks in my mind), but that's not going to make me pass up a good deal.

My students warned me about April 1st.  They said that teachers are the prime target of eager pranksters on this day, so I'm planning to be ready for it.  But no one warned me that the grocery store was going to try and get a head start.

At least the Chinese stores don't sell food.  Judging by how crowded they are with crappy clothes, every cat in town would be inside of them eating some pretty crazy stuff.  It would be too much to handle.

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